Tuesday, 19 January 2010

Figure watching

The iced finger reviewing has been taking a sideline over the christmas and new year break but now its all good to go again as the assualt from all angles of the danger food spectrum has ceased. I shall continue my local travels to the independant bakeries and might also brave a few offerings from super markets. May'be...

Heres to 2010.

May the cake be with you.

Friday, 13 November 2009

Radius mapping

Fingers of joy are incoming ye impatient ones.

I have been driving around looking at the offerings that one has to take. They look mighty fine indeed. I have drawn a circle on a map that is 40 miles wide and the amount of iced fingers to be found is simply astonishing.

Worthy of a heart attack at minimum.

Over the dark evil months oh winter thou shall get right to it.

Fingers are good.

Fingers are good.

More over it is damn sexy too.

Monday, 19 October 2009


Eating all these cakes will have serious implications if left unmonitored and unacted upon over the winter months.

All this sugar is exceptionally good at making the average cake lover a bit porkesque in much the same way as a particular policeman out of simpsons.

This is why I have put an exercise bike in my front room and connected it to a dynamo thingy to generate electricity.

Now if I wish to watch a dvd or listen to music I must get on the exercise bike and pedal like mad to keep everything powered up or else I am in the dark.

Be warned. Cakes are bad. Cakes are bad. But Cakes are so damn good.

Some say crack is addictive. They clearly haven't ate a good iced finger.

Friday, 16 October 2009

Failed but suceeded

Today's iced finger has failed to materialise. My request that the bakery DHL me one of their finest same day dispatch has not worked as expected. I must try hader to get these sugar laiden delights to my table.

Oh well, I am busy digging holes and wheelbarrowing stuff around tomorrow morning, so by 11am I think the next bakery visit is well justified.

I think I might just have fixed the mole problem I have had in my back garden too. Get in.

Thursday, 15 October 2009

New Fingers

Rumour has it that I might well have a new iced finger to review by tomorrow. Yey. I am also having to review cake for my Craig Bragdy 2009 Cake-off. Crickey, this might turn out to be a heavy friday.

Wednesday, 14 October 2009

Iced Finger 1 - Oldhams Bakery - Denbigh - Denbighshire

Here we present the first of the iced fingers up for review.

The review shall follow shortly. I must first eat my dinner and sort out a few mole hills.

* a pause of a day or so for me to wake up and type has passed by and now I add the review after sleeping upon it.

Oldhams bakery situated on the high street of my former home town Denbigh in North Wales is a nice simple functional bakery. What you see is what you get and thats no bad thing.

Denbigh has a castle on the top of a hill which got bombed by its very owners in a mead soaked fit of gun power laiden rage, but that is a different story, and one which in reality isn't so crazy as my own version.

The finger (or bloody bun as I keep wanting to say, but political correctness stops me) is a pretty good one. Its good in the sense it tastes nice and has a decent dough with good texture and not a hint of burn or dryness. The icing is a bit on the sticky side, but at least it isn't cracking off.

All good so far, but the gripe is with the dimesions. Its a plump one. Being from a rural welsh town I do like value and would probably feel ripped off if the finger was a skinny one. But the plump ones have there problems. Trying to eat the thing unless you have a big mouth like myself, would be a task akin to cinderella's sister trying on the deluxe flipflop of fairy tale dreams. A bit of a squeeze.

The place is neat and tidy, the staff are very friendly and relaxed in their clean uniform, yet on the ball so this all goes in the fingers favour.

I eat the bun, no I mean finger and have a smile on my face afterwards. This is good.

All things considered and the numbers are put into my finger calculator, the score that comes out is a very fair and decent:


I look forward to more iced finger fun.


Thursday, 8 October 2009

Marking Criteria for Iced Fingers

Marking Criteria
Below is the outlined marking criteria for iced fingers of all persuasions.

To attain a higher mark the bread finger must be sufficiently sweet with a bread texture airing more of the side of a doughy yet light bread. Excessive heaviness, dryness and any burning or over baking shall incur a loss of points

Extra points shall be awarded for the addition of saffron in the sweet bread mixture.

Dimensions of the finger are important. The highest scoring buns shall have a length of around 150mm and a width of approximately 50mm shaped into the classic curved finger roll shape we all know. Points shall be deducted for excessively short, long, thin or fat fingers. It needs to be comfy to hold and eat. Not clumsy and overly large, yet not so small as to allow the owner to feel short changed.

The icing of highest scoring shall be of a consistency whereby it has stuck to the finger without cracking off, yet not so wet to stick to the roof of ones mouth as this is most annoying. Some slightly wetness or dryness is acceptable, yet anything more will result in significant points deduction.

The icing should occupy a strip along the top of the finger that is not too wide as to hamper eating by holding it via the finger sides. Marks deducted for messing or overly wide icing.

Plain white icing is the accepted norm although points shall not be deducted for other variations of icing providing they do not detract from the taste of the bread finger. Overpowering

The packaging that the iced finger is sold in shall be marked on functional performance predominantly as this is the most important factor. The packing must keep the iced finger in as good a condition as possible so that it remains edible after an average car journey of a few miles with other shopping in ones luggage compartment.

Should the packaging perform then some extra points will be awarded for particularly neat and/or original packaging.

Service shall be most highly scored when it is polite, helpful and efficient. Points deducted for any lacking of these requirements.

Price is also a consideration, does one feel like the price has reflected the quality of the iced finger? If so more points may be awarded


About Me

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Ahhhh 28 years old, drive an estate car but I don't have a pet dog yet. Become pre-occupied with odd things like tree bark and performance tyres at the drop of a hat.